Big Fat Hairy Living

I reluctantly scared the pidgies away, then got on with the business of sweeping. There is so much dust on my balcony it’s not funny. It’s covered with filth from the months of construction. I did a quick job of sweeping and then I washed the windows. Because of the annoying triple sliding window construction on the bottom half of the windows, it’s frustrating to get everything perfect, but it all looks much better now.

I want to go out on my balcony to sweep it and wash my windows, but I can’t because two incredibly cute pigeons are sitting on it. One of them is sitting facing the apartment, and the other is sitting with his head under the railing, looking out onto the street. Every time I approach the window to look at them, the one who is roosting facing the window gets up partially, as though he’s ready to fly away if I scare him.

They’re just so adorable!

We are killed and tortured and beaten every day.

800,000 people at Toronto Pride.

Pride has officially wound down and ended. Everyone has gone home or is on their way home, and Brodie and I are at Eric’s place taking a shower because the water in my apartment has been turned off since 9AM for maintenance. The day after pride they turn off the water in an apartment building full of hung-over cum-stained fags? What is the deal with that?

This has easily been the best Pride for me ever. Having Brian, Brodie, Cory, and Greg staying at my place and hanging out with me has made for some really cool, really fun times. The after-Pride chat in the living room on Sunday night was the coolest, most fun way to wind down the whole weekend.

The highlight of the weekend for me was definitely marching in the parade. This is the seventh Pride I’ve been to, but it’s the first time I marched with the Bear Buddies in the parade. I enjoyed marching and dancing down Yonge Street in my fatigues and garrison boots, dancing and rubbing my belly for the gawking heterosexuals. In fact, the sheer number of gawking breeders was bothersome. Once the parade got south of Carlton, the breeders outnumbered the fags and the expressions of the faces in the crowds turned from fag/dyke “Yeah, yeah!” cheering to “Oh my god, these gay guys fat and hairy!” expressions of shock.

I just marched in the Pride parade with Elvira Kurt. She was in the bear float with us! She and her partner said, “We’re the lesbians you found in the woods and raised.”

And if you hear her make a joke about how next year the animal rights float should be next to the Leather Ball float, you know where she got it from.

Yesterday evening, I ran into Chris the red-headed muscle bear at the corner of Church and Wellesley. He works nights, so he had just gotten up. We ended up going back to his place, where he showed me the staining he’d done on his patio and the new furniture and patio lights he’d got. Then we went inside and cuddle on his bed a little.

After that, and after going for dinner, we headed back to his place where we hung out. We ended up watching TV in his friends’ place around the corner; he had to go there to inject their diabetic cat with insulin because they’re on vacation. He then injected me with his uncut dick.

From the National Post:

Since he came to Canada two years ago, Anthony the Egyptian tortoise’s sex life has been as barren as, well, the Sahara Desert.

Now Mike Brobbel, the handler and would-be matchmaker for this endangered tortoise, is searching for a lady Egyptian tortoise, about the size and shape of an overturned teacup, who might be receptive to Anthony’s advances.

“There’s no Egyptian tortoises at any zoo in Canada,” Mr. Brobbel said. “I’ve been looking in the States [and] there are a few females, but they’re preoccupied in breeding programs. I don’t want to take a female away from something that’s working.”

If Mr. Brobbel can find a lady tortoise, or two, his breeding program would establish the first colony of Egyptian tortoises in Canada. It could also provide the creatures for other zoos, and help preserve at least the remnants of a species that is rapidly disappearing from the wild. As well, it would save Anthony — who has another 60 or 70 years of life in him — from perpetual celibacy.

Tortoises are so cute.