Big Fat Hairy Living

I’ve been sick for the past week, so I haven’t been at work. While I was sick, I had lots of time to think about things. I realized:

• My apartment looks much nicer when I don’t see it all day.
• Being sick makes me want to answer the phone even less than usual.
• I stopped reading stupid political blogs and I don’t miss them one bit.
• I’m really boring and don’t have much of interest to write unless something bitchy or stupid happens to me.
• Most people who have blogs are even more boring than me and have even less to say.
• There isn’t a single TV judge who doesn’t do the “straight talking tell-it-as-it-is” shtick. I’d like to see a real judge get away without spouting any legalese.
• “Are You Being Served?” is on five times a day
• The actors in “Are You Being Served” all seem to have been models for “The Big Book of British Smiles.”
• Ricki Lake has gotten fat.
• Jerry Springer is not the quality talk show I remember it to be.
• The little animation bits that YTV runs between cartoons are often more entertaining than the cartoons themselves.
• Call-in shows attract the stupidest, most illiterate people on the planet. How can people that stupid remember the 11 digits needed to dial in?
• Daytime Internet surfing is much more boring from home than from work.
• There are too many science fiction novels with really bad dialogue.
• Good books feel like they end too soon. Kim Stanley Robinson’s books feel like they don’t end soon enough.

Yeah, I’m all better now.

Work on Monday. Blech.

I hate it when guys who describe their dicks in personal ads use the term “mushroom head.” Is there a more unerotic word out there than “mushroom?” Can you imagine getting fucked up the ass and saying “Oh yeah, I love your big mushroom head?”

Try saying it out loud. “Mushroom head.” It just sounds stupid.

Canada is great for queers. If you want to be a good homo and not look at bad, bad porn, that is.

Someone who claims to be named “Gary Utter” flames me in that raghead thread on “Dean’s World” that I referred to. This “Gary Utter” person says that I

• am a politically correct kneejerk liberal
• am a pompous self righteous twit
• am afraid to live life in anything other than an approved manner
• can’t find any joy in the world
• am uptight
• am flawed as a human being
• live by artifical [sic] standards
• clearly need help

How I love Dean’s World. Your one stop shop for intelligent, well-reasoned, respectful right-wing commentary.

Carlyn Zwarenstein’s editorial-disguised-as-news-story in the latest issue of Now Magazine does a great job of misrepresenting the invasion of abusive street kids into the village. It’s full of errors, distortions, and flat-out lies.

Unlike Zwarenstein, I’ve lived in the village for years, and I’ve seen the change from a regular group of homeless people that used to be in the village to the gang of unrepentant street kids and drug dealers who are there now. It’s obvious that Zwarenstein has spent zero time on Church street, because she refers to a “Peter Pan” restaurant. It’s “Pita Pan.”

I used to feel comfortable occasionally giving change to panhandlers or politely declining, but I’ve gotten tired of looking panhandling street kids in the eye and politely saying no only to be called faggot or cocksucker or fat-ass in return. These are the people Zwarenstein thinks we owe our spare change.

Zwarenstein sees any criticism of the street kids who have invaded the village as proof that “it’s fashionable to paint the poor as criminals.” She sees no connection between a rise in gay-bashing incidents and the invasion drug-dealing street kids who hurl homophobic epithets at passersby. In fact, on more than one occasion, these street kids have had fights so bad that ambulances had to come to deal with the injuries.

Zwarenstein glosses over all this, admitting that “residents have a right to be free of harassment on their recreation grounds,” then quickly moving back to vilifying village residents, expressing amazement at the fact that people would suggest not giving these street kids money. Heaven forbid that we should want to make sure our money is used appropriately by giving it to charities who can control how it’s spent.

Zwarenstein’s report of what happened at the community meeting at the 519 on September 2 (she gets the date wrong) portrays village residents in the worst possible light, attempting to make them look like selfish grinches who just want to get the evil homeless people out of their park. She barely mentions any of the discussion regarding drug dealers, and she misquotes a man named Jeffrey, identifying him as “Guy” and leaving out the part of his comment where he complains about people getting drunk in the park and leaving behind empty beer bottles. Check out Fab Magazine’s report in issue 224 for a more balanced report on the meeting.

Zwarenstein takes a cheap shot at the end of her editorial, saying that “Tolerance wasn’t always a dirty word in the village, especially in Cawthra Park, birthplace of Toronto’s Pride.” Zwarenstein seems to think that we should excuse these kids for their behaviour simply because they’re homeless. I don’t.

Dean Esmay: “‘Ragheads’ I have a problem with, for several reasons, but some saying it in the emotional context of 9/11 I can live with. Even though it makes me uncomfortable since I have Arab friends and want very little besides to make the Arab world a better place for its people to live–because that’s in our interest as well as theirs.”

Don’t even hint at criticizing anything christians do because Esmay will ban you from his site. But he can live with racist epithets as long as they’re “in the emotional context of 9/11.” And he can say that because some of his best friends are Arabs!

Scapegoatee, possibly more of a cynical cunt than I am, mentions in his journal a picture of some protesters at Southern Decadence.

I think I know what those protesters are really thinking.

(Click to enlarge)

There seem to be way more hot TTC drivers than there used to be. Today I got a thick and juicy bushy-goateed bus driver with tattoos all over his arms. Yesterday, the guy driving the streetcar I took to my boyfriend’s place was a sexy young blond cub thing.

I wanted to ask him for a transfer … into his pants.

A bigoted Tory: “I do believe [gay marriage] is a threat to family values, yes.”

Dalton McGuinty, in support of gay marriage, but not hesitating to use his family to political advantage: “Terri and I have the most small-c conservative relationship going — high school sweethearts, dated for eight years, had four kids in five years, married now 23 years and we are hopelessly in love … I don’t feel threatened or offended in any way at all if a gay or lesbian couple chose to marry and I don’t see how it’s threatening to the future of my children either.”

Howard Hampton: “That’s a conscious decision my wife and I have made, that we have our political life, our work, our job, but our kids are not going to be paraded in front of the television cameras … Frankly, I don’t find that very inviting or attractive.” Mr. Hampton said he would rather win on campaign “issues that affect people’s daily lives.”

Folks, marriage is a federal issue.